The Desperate Housewives’ Club in DHA

By Shaista Zulfiqar

While the ladies of the Wisteria Lane get together, gossip and catch up on who’s been doing what, our Desperate Housewives’ Club in DHA has a slightly more pompous agenda. A typical get-together of desi housewives’ meeting starts with sending out invitations, both in person and over phone.

A meeting, in almost all cases, is either a khatm, milaad or something along the same lines and is typically held when one of the club members gets a new sofa set, new flooring or completely revamps her sitting room.

For any outsider, these meetings are noble and have a higher purpose. These meetings have only recently evolved to be significant events for our stay-at-home moms who have little to do other than get their nails done, take care of their skin or/and give the ‘help’ a piece of their mind every so often. With all their cuckoos having left the nest, these housewives either share their homes with their bahus and sons or their cats.

So these milaads are a bit of a recreational thing for them where the club members gather but once they set aside their tasbihs, the real deal begins. From how good or otherwise someone’s nai bahu is to whose son has started staying out late (again), anything about everything is discussed ardently. When that ends, detailed analysis on the hostess’ new home décor begins.

“Hasn’t anyone noticed my new curtains?” chirps Mrs Sadiq, the hostess, seeming mildly offended as though the basic purpose of the milaad seems lost on the ladies.

“Noticed? We already discussed it when I sent you to fetch tasbihs,” Mrs Rafi says teasingly and all burst into laughter before getting engrossed into a detailed discussion about the cloth, cost and the oh-so-interesting story of how and why Mr & Mrs Sadiq finally agreed upon a certain colour.

The meeting concludes just when Mrs Sadiq feels she has shown off every bit of new furniture, decoration piece and crockery she intended to unveil on the event, together with the new bahu of course, after which the ladies decide upon who would be hosting the next milaad. Whoever has the next revamping scheduled happily accepts to host the next event and so the cycle continues.